Which one of you ladies is the father?

Newsless.

2007-09-03T21:22:00.000-05:00

Well, here we are, three months gone from our last post and with no news. At all. Or, at least, none regarding the baby we don't have yet. Though lots of other things have been going on....Lisa has quit her job (back in July) and though she is now ready for another job, we are both very happy she left the seething pit of hell where she worked before. I am still at my job, and finally getting the

Brownback, ye shall now be known as "silverback."

2007-05-04T23:50:00.000-05:00

Sweet mother of mercy, please tell me the American people cannot possibly be stupid enough to elect another Republican. How can you not believe you are descended from apes? Oh, I know...because you ARE STILL AN APE!

Homewrecker.

2007-04-15T18:19:00.000-05:00

Yes, that's me. A homewrecker. I've told and told Prince William that it wouldn't work out, what with him being the blue-blooded 25-year-old heir to the British throne, and I'm a 36-year-old American midwestern lesbian. But he wouldn't take no for an answer, and now he's gone and dumped that nice girl he was seeing. Oh, did I lead him on? Now I know how Wallis Simpson felt.

Where are they now?

2007-04-14T20:48:00.000-05:00

Things we are up to lately, in no particular order:Having inventory at work (Lisa today, Tricia next Saturday)Serving on jury duty (Tricia)Building a privacy fence in our back yard (both)Seeing a new reproductive endocrinologist for some aggressive fertility fun (both of us, but mostly Lisa, to be honest)Buying new glasses, being thankful for insurance, enduring the disapproving stares of

Things that keep me awake at night.

2007-04-14T00:22:00.000-05:00

I'd always thought the noun form of 'admonish' is 'admonition.' But lately, and I've been seeing it everywhere, like haunting, I see the word 'admonishment.' They both appear to be noun forms of the verb, but which is more correct? Admonishment sounds a lot like astonishment to me, and frankly almost a little made up, though clearly it is legit.I think I will stick with 'admonition,' but I'm

One. Word. Meme.

2007-04-12T21:17:00.000-05:00

Taken from Jeff.ONE. WORD. MEME. 1. Where is your cell phone? Purse2. Describe your boyfriend/girlfriend/S.O.? Complex.3. Your hair? Wavy.4. Your mother? Fighter.5. Your father? Performer.6. Your favorite item? Camera.7. Your dream last night? Forgettable.8. Your favorite drink? Tea.9. Your dream car? Viper.10. The room you are in? Living.11. Your ex? Boy.12. Your fear? Conflict.13. What do you

And, on to another try....

2007-03-21T19:37:00.000-05:00

As you might have detected from the long lag since my last post, we do not yet have any good news to report. The stick was peed upon, and delivered its inevitable one-line-not-two-no-matter-how-hard-we-squinted. Then we waited. And waited. And took another test, as Lisa is a very punctual person in every way. But alas, no on the stick and then no for real.March was a bust as Lisa was out of town

Back in the saddle again.

2007-02-21T22:51:00.000-06:00

Well, we are trying (again) for the elusive baby that we know is out there somewhere, and we're currently in the dreaded two-week wait for the first time in a long time. The pregnancy test has been purchased and lies here on the coffee table in its box, testing our willpower. We are resisting thus far, as it is probably too early. I'd forgotten how very much this part of the whole thing nerved me

Something new?

2007-01-23T20:54:00.000-06:00

Trying out something new...wordpress instead of blogger. Not sure I'll like it better, so I'm not deleting this blog, yet.Visit me at polleywog.wordpress.com

Baby-making machine.

2007-01-16T20:04:00.000-06:00

Yep, that's my lady...Ok, before I get killed by said "lady, " let me say simply that all the tests are coming back as a "go" for trying again for a baby. Our doctor did an FSH test which came back at a 4 or something...our understanding is that 10 would be not-so-good, and so 4 is pretty darn good, especially for we in our later 30s. And all the regular health screenings are good, so plans are

Another year gone by.

2007-01-10T20:35:00.000-06:00

2007?! Are you kidding me?No, apparently you are not. And, by the by, we still have no baby. But we're working on it! We've finally picked a new donor and plans are underway for another attempt in February. (January was thwarted due to timing issues and such...perhaps a good omen, though, as our previous successful (albeit short-lived) attempt was in February. THREE YEARS AGO. Can you even

Blogger calling.

2006-12-07T20:30:00.000-06:00

My sister e-mailed me to say:Your blog called today, it wanted me to tell you it’s dead. I know, I know. I just haven't had anything to say, especially nothing to say about our quest to become parents, since we honestly haven't done anything lately to make that dream a reality. All that's about to change, though. We're getting back in the game.So there, sister.

Just an observation.

2006-05-17T23:55:00.000-05:00

Though it matters not a whit to any real life or love or activity in this world, I just wanted to note that meta-celebrities (you know, famous for being famous) Brandon Davis and Paris Hilton are total assholes. This is a 3 minute video of oil-heir Davis spewing obscenities about Lindsay Lohan's genitals. I never, ever thought I'd consider speaking up on Lohan's behalf, but at least she does some

Pssst....

2006-04-27T00:11:00.000-05:00

Oooh, I forgot to mention this nifty book I just read. It's called Manhunt, and it's the story of the hunt for Lincoln's assassin, and his co-conspirators. It was wonderful and has already inspired us to check out a pictorial biography of Lincoln, and I'm now on to biographies of the President and Mrs. Lincoln, as well as the seemingly silly book that alleges Lincoln was gay. (Was he or wasn't he

Being and nothingness.

2006-04-27T00:05:00.000-05:00

Just getting in under the wire of a full month since my last post, I can offer you only this:THE INTERNATIONAL TITLES OF THE GOLDEN GIRLS- As Supergatas (Brasil)- Carré de Dames (Canada)- Kullakesed (Estonia)- Tyttökullat (Finland)- Les Craquantes (France)- Öreglányok (Hungary)- Cuori senza età (Italy)- Pantertanter (Scandinavia)- Las Chicas de Oro (Spain)- Altin Kizlar (Turkey)I have nothing of

Good 'n' Funny.

2006-02-22T20:56:00.000-06:00

He linked to him, who linked to this. And I'm still laughing.Some of the giggles came from this, I'm sure:Which reminds me, Lisa's Valentine's Day present finally arrived--she's had to content herself with a little photo of it up 'til now--and the Complete New Yorker on DVD is, quite simply, amazing.

It's feast or famine with me, I tell you.

2006-02-21T20:09:00.000-06:00

Ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.Mwah ha ha ha. It's not your children we want, it's your wives.Stupid assholes.

Bambinos galore.

2006-02-21T19:59:00.000-06:00

Wonderful, fabulous people I know are welcoming their daughters home, and getting ready to welcome their Harpos SO soon. How exciting is that?

Fred Phelps is surely going to hell.

2006-02-21T19:45:00.000-06:00

I won't even go into that any further; if you've heard of the "Reverend" Fred Phelps and his band of demon-spawn, you don't want to hear of them again, and if you haven't heard of them, consider yourself lucky. Their practice of protesting at the funerals of dead U.S. soldiers is pretty repellent to begin with. When you consider that they're protesting because they think gay people have somehow

Love thy neighbor.

2006-02-11T11:48:00.000-06:00

These imbeciles are just filling me with their love of the Lord.The billboards on which they are spewing their hatred are owned by Viacom/CBS Outdoor, who also own the Logo Channel. "Look, look, we're making money from gays, AND from gay-bashers. Are we awesome, or what?" You can e-mail them if you like. I did:While running errands yesterday, I was shocked to see a billboard (on space owned by

Co-inky-dinky.

2006-02-11T08:04:00.000-06:00

Even though it's the Bush administration's policy NOT to divulge specific terrorist threats that were averted, and even though they're under bipartisan fire for the ILLEGAL spying they've been doing on Americans, I'm sure it's just a coincidence that they chose now to reveal the Los Angeles attack they thwarted through intelligence gathering.Now, why they chose to reveal it without even telling

Say it ain't so, Joe.

2006-02-07T21:41:00.000-06:00

I was a casual observer of the Super Bowl last night, paying scant attention to the ads and looking up at the game periodically while I finished doing our taxes. I was rooting for Pittsburgh, but it wouldn't make a whit of difference to me who won, really. I was interested to see the pregame introduction of the living Super Bowl MVPs from games 1-39. Baseball is very good at using the national

Polo ponies and the like.

2006-01-14T20:52:00.000-06:00

I'm no fan of Tommy Lee Jones, but his image as that of a stoic Texas cowboy is, for some reason, far more comforting to me than the reality: he is a snotty, rich, jet-setting, polo-playing aesthete.What's wrong with that? I have no idea. It just annoyed me for some reason.

How exciting!

2005-12-18T09:37:00.000-06:00

My sister got engaged last night! This morning she asked me to be her maid of honor! (Of course, if she hadn't, I might have killed her this afternoon ;-) Now I hope she picks out a decent dress for me to wear and gives me enough time to lose maybe 10 pounds or so...Because her job involves media relations for an athletic team, her boyfriend (oops, fiance) was able to arrange to have a

National Transportation Stupidity Board

2005-12-15T22:33:00.000-06:00

NTSB: Plane at Midway needed more runway Well, no shit. Did you have to conduct a study to find that out?

Oh, I did have one more thing...

2005-12-15T21:08:00.000-06:00

I forgot. Last weekend, for my birthday, we went to the art museum and the zoo. (We're members at the museum, and are planning to join the zoo, but the great thing about this city is that most of the cultural activities are free.) There is an exhibit at the zoo called The Living World. You punch in your birthdate, and it tells you lots of fun (and somewhat depressing) stuff about the world we

Some fun bits, stolen from others...

2005-12-15T20:13:00.000-06:00

Because I am lazy, I have very little in the way of commentary or insight this week. I can say that Ford has decided to resume advertising in gay publications, in defiance of the protests from the religious wrong. (There's nothing "right" about 'em.) I kid myself that my letter of complaint may have been a flake of snow in the avalanche that changed their minds. I mean, how would they possibly

Shit is pissing me off.

2005-12-06T22:28:00.000-06:00

The Ford Motor Company has bowed to pressure from the American Family Association (yes, those bigoted wacko freaks again), and agreed to pull their advertising from gay publications. In response, I have bowed to pressure from my conscience and decided that, though I've been driving Fords for several years, I will never buy another Ford unless or until they reverse this ridiculous position. I

Where a kid can be a kid...

2005-12-04T22:53:00.000-06:00

The good news is, Chuck E. Cheese now has a policy that every game is one-token-per-play, and they've dramatically improved the quality of their pizza. The bad news? It's still rather nerve-shattering to be in that place for two hours or more on a Sunday afternoon, surrounded by hundreds of shrieking, running, hyper kids ranging in age (for the most part) from 3-8.Why were we there? Well, one of

Holiday fun.

2005-12-01T21:04:00.000-06:00

I love December, I love Christmas (and I love the fact that other faiths celebrate holidays in December), and everything that comes with it....decorating, shopping, eating (too much) and just the overall feeling of goodwill that should exist all the time. We haven't put up our tree yet (it's late for us, and will be fun to decorate the new house for the first time). But, to get into the spirit,

Do I look like I care?

2005-11-25T21:25:00.000-06:00

I have friends and family members who are constantly forwarding messages to me that are always annoying, and often downright offensive. I think I may have bitched about this before, but these are people who seem to love and care for me. Yet, when they hit the FORWARD button, they must not even think for a second, "Hey, wow, this goes against everything she believes in. Ah, hell, let's send it

Gotta get up to get down.

2005-11-15T23:04:00.000-06:00

Or sometimes, you have to get down to get back up. In either case, I've decided not to whine about my life...for today, at least. Instead, here's a lot of things that ARE making me smile right now. There are so many of them, I can't believe I was feeling sorry for myself. We're going to contact a local clinic about trying to have a baby. We talked to the nurses at a booth at PrideFest this

I had no idea.

2005-11-14T23:10:00.000-06:00

I didn't know how much I could ever miss a person, until Alexis went home and it has begun to settle in that I will not see her every day, will not see her for a while, and will likely never again have her here with me. (And of course I have to hope that I won't, because if she comes to live here again, it means the US Military has messed up her family again.) I've missed people before. I moved

Well, DO you love it?

2005-11-13T20:55:00.000-06:00

My friend has recently sold his home and moved in with his boyfriend. Their new house was recently finished, after many, many months of hassles with the builder. (Said boyfriend was expecting to move into this house almost a year ago, if I'm not mistaken. I'm glad for the delays, because I do believe things happen for a reason and, as it happened, the house became ready at a time when Gatsby felt

I love the Ladies!

2005-11-11T16:07:00.000-06:00

Ok, I know, this isn't news to anyone. But I mean, in particular, THE Ladies, which is my special pet name for the Golden Girls...and today is a Golden Girls marathon on Lifetime, so you know where I'll be as soon as the quitting bell chimes at work!

Ah, the world is a depressing place, isn't it?

2005-11-10T21:07:00.000-06:00

So, I already know that Wal-Mart is a pretty evil corporation, treating its employees--and the communities they live in--like shit. If you doubt that, read Nickel and Dimed or How Wal-Mart is Destroying America...take some Prozac first, though. In the midst of my reading of the latter book, I ran across a posting on America Blog that alerted me to Target's policy that allows pharmacists to refuse

Home from vacation...need a vacation from vacation.

2005-11-02T20:36:00.000-06:00

You know how it goes? You go on vacation, and then you need a break from vacation? We had a wonderful time, though, visiting family in New Hampshire. It was very restful, and we got to see our 2-year-old niece, who is smart, funny, gorgeous and basically perfect. Not that I'm biased, of course. It was beautiful weather--cold, mostly gloomy and rainy, just what we like. We went hiking, slept, read

Lex is gone home, we are sad.

2005-10-23T16:37:00.000-05:00

Well, Alexis is back with her Mommy & Daddy, and we're heartbroken (but of course happy she's with her parents). We'll miss her so much.

Did I ever tell you the one about...

2005-10-10T20:50:00.000-05:00

...my grandfather? No? Well, first off, I am lucky enough to still have 3 of my 4 grandparents living and in relatively good health, considering they are all aged 77 to 80. (My grandfather only died a couple of years ago, so I was blessed to have all of my grandparents well into my 30s, for which I am grateful.) My widowed grandmother still travels with us, is taking up golf this year and will

PMS Sucks.

2005-09-21T22:33:00.000-05:00

I'm having my monthly hormonal swings, courtesy of the sick joke that is PMS, and feeling very sad about the looming departure of the toddler niece, who will return to her mom late next month. It's not simply PMS, of course; I will most definitely be sad when she goes, but right now I'm having irrationally sad thoughts, thinking of her tiny little self being all confused and thinking we didn't

It'll make your fillings rattle.

2005-09-20T22:24:00.000-05:00

And I can say that, finally having received my first-ever fillings over the past few years. What is the "it" of which I speak? Why, the charming sound emitted from any car driven by a young man with hunormous speakers. (Yes, hunormous...similar to katrillion.) Anyway, these cars are, surprisingly often, total pieces of shit, yet they have boomin' systems that must have cost more than the car

Oh, give me just a tiny friggin' break.

2005-09-17T21:53:00.000-05:00

SAN FRANCISCO (AP) -- Barry Bonds used to commit any spare time before games to lifting weights, working meticulously to build up his leg strength for long nights of standing in left field and on the basepaths following his many walks. His bum right knee no longer allows it. He is carrying a few extra pounds around his middle and vows to spend the offseason bringing his playing weight

You are now entering the GULF OPPORTUNITY ZONE.

2005-09-16T07:43:00.000-05:00

I see that last night, the leader of the free world coined yet another of his stupid little names, christening the reconstruction of New Orleans and Mississippi as the "Gulf Opportunity Zone." He then told the people of the region, "You are not alone."To which he should have added, "Anymore. Now that I've seen what a shitstorm my normally lackadaisical attitude has caused. And that it might keep

Vacation, all I ever wanted...

2005-09-15T21:27:00.000-05:00

My friend Shelli posted this, and I received it in an e-mail from my sister's boyfriend, who knew it would do my liberal little heart some good to have a laugh at the expense of Bush & Shrub.When the stupidity of the son makes you long for the kinder, gentler stupidity of the father, you know it's a sad, sad thing.

Is it just me....

2005-09-15T20:10:00.000-05:00

or does George Bush look like an Oompa Loompa?

2005-09-07T21:26:00.000-05:00

It seems an odd thing to think of saying goodbye to an American city, a major city that was--10 days ago--home to about a million people. Yet I feel more and more certain that New Orleans may never again be what it was, and will take a very long time to be anything close.I lived there for two years, and all of the things I had loved about it when I visited, became exactly the things I did not

Are you as twisted as I am?

2005-09-06T21:35:00.000-05:00

Do you ever shop at Bath & Body Works? And, if so, when you're showering with the shower gel called Coconut Lime Verbena, do you ever find yourself humming the Tone Loc song Funky Cold Medina? No?Uh, me neither.

An interesting website

2005-09-02T22:05:00.000-05:00

Shelli posted several weeks ago about a movement to have everyone add a cell phone entry for ICE (In Case of Emergency), and to then key in a number for that entry that would connect to a close friend or family member who should be notified on your behalf if you are sick or hurt. It seems emergency personnel often have no idea who to contact, especially if you are an unmarried adult living on

One friend accounted for...

2005-09-02T10:21:00.000-05:00

We're happy to report that one of our many friends in New Orleans has gotten in touch and she is ok, staying with family in rural Louisiana. No power, but they are ok, have food and water and are out of the melee that is currently New Orleans. I'm grateful for any good news right now.

New Orleans.

2005-09-01T19:12:00.000-05:00

Lisa and I used to live in New Orleans. We are so grateful we don't live there any longer. A friend of ours is safe and sound, we know, and is lucky to have left with her pets and to have a place to stay for as long as needed with her sister. We have many more friends who may be missing; we've e-mailed them and have not heard back, which leads us to fear that they are still in the city, and did

Random thoughts. The only kind I have.

2005-08-21T21:27:00.000-05:00

Well, after my previous whining and self-pity, I'm feeling a bit more Zen about our prospects for parenthood, feeling like it will happen somehow, someday and I need to not be a total spaz about it. There are millions of people with WAY worse problems than that. I have Lisa, and I have a good job, and I have my health, and I have family and friends who love me, and I havea nice place to live and

Perhaps....

2005-08-09T23:16:00.000-05:00

I should consider changing the name of this blog. After all, we are not two mommies, or even one mommy. We are two aunts (and damn good ones) but not mommies. And maybe we will never be mommies. Every single couple from the core group of people we started out with on Fertility Friend is either pregnant, in the process of adopting, or has had a child already. Could it be that we will have a baby,

And more good news...

2005-08-09T21:27:00.000-05:00

As I'm just catching up on my blog reading, Shelli & Narda are very close to adopting a newborn girl, provided the birth mother doesn't change her mind. (And I hope she doesn't, not only for Shelli & Narda's sake, but for the fact that she's a very young, single girl and keeping the baby might not be best for either of them.)

Congratulations are in order...

2005-08-09T21:19:00.000-05:00

for Jen and Cait, who are pregnant and feeling a mix of joy and fear that must be making it hard to even sit or sleep or think. I'm very happy for them...they deserve this happiness as much as anyone I can think of.I don't know what it means that I am, in fact, at least 96% thrilled for them and only 4% jealous that it isn't us, or that I'm not even sure if I want it to be us EVER, or if I'm just

Still searching for perfection.

2005-08-03T23:28:00.000-05:00

Jeff has defended his choice, and his arguments are well-reasoned, but I remain unswayed. I refuse to believe that Melissa Manchester had the perfect pop song of any decade, much less of any two or more combined decades. For one thing, there's talking in that song of hers, and I can't truly lose myself in 3 minutes of pure pop bliss if there's any kind of spoken-word business going on there.This

Two ponderous questions....

2005-08-03T21:37:00.000-05:00

I worked late tonight, and arrived home at 7:30 or so to find Lisa (with migraine) and Alexis (with baby powder all over her, having just popped the cap off the poweder with her teeth, spraying the white talc all over her face and chest). Lisa mentioned that her migraine was probably premenstrual, so I said, "Hey, maybe this month we'll remember to write it down and start temping and call G. to

Dove, beauty and the almighty dollar.

2005-08-02T22:12:00.000-05:00

I'm torn by the new Dove advertising campaign for their firming lotions and creams. On the positive side, the ads feature models of all sizes (well, all sizes up to size 12, that is) and these women are curvy, beautiful and REAL. It's definitely a step in the right direction.On the other hand, as Seth Stevenson points out in Slate, the message they're sending is that you're beautiful, sure, but

Even if I DO hate the president...

2005-08-01T07:45:00.000-05:00

...there are still so many good things in life. Like the Mamas and the Papas, yes, and Harry Potter, and poetry. (Lots of good people, too, but this is a "things" category. I'm including the Mamas and the Papas as a "thing," because as people, they didn't really do much for me. Except when Michelle Phillips was on Knots Landing as Nicolette Sheridan's mother. But I digress...) I get a poem in my

Monday, Monday.

2005-08-01T07:20:00.000-05:00

I love The Mamas and the Papas. They're next to the word "harmony" in the dictionary.I don't love everything, though:

One of the four horsemen.

2005-07-31T22:14:00.000-05:00

We were at the St. Louis Galleria the other day, and noticed this gaggle of preteen girls with their hair weirdly clipped and with all kinds of makeup and glittery crap all over their faces. WTF? we wondered.Turns out they'd been at a party at Club Libby Lu, some sort of frightening store for future streetwalkers. I'm sorry to offend you if you love this store or, perhaps, own this company. But

I'm starting to agree with Tom.

2005-07-30T21:50:00.000-05:00

Cruise, that is. About all medicines being toxins you put into your body, I mean.I'm just kidding of course. Tom's completely off his rocker, I fear, but at least if there were no drugs, there would be no drug commercials. I rue the day our government decided to allow prescription medications to be advertised on television. First off, as the writer Bill Bryson pointed out (in a much funnier

Just goes to show...

2005-07-27T06:14:00.000-05:00

I guess money and fame aren't everything, if the travails of Mindy McCready are any indication. I don't follow country music, really, but I've heard of her so she must be pretty famous. Isn't there some old saying about how being famous won't fix the part of you that's broken? I can't imagine having to deal with such personal stuff in such a public way, the fact that I blog my darkest thoughts

He bangs.

2005-07-26T21:57:00.000-05:00

Ricky Martin, gay or not gay? Discuss.

On a lighter note...

2005-07-26T21:17:00.000-05:00

I know I complain A LOT about the spelling and grammar mistakes of others. Admittedly, I'm far from perfect in that regard myself, but I try very hard to get it right. So, if you run a food-service business, shouldn't you know how to spell a la carte? Which isn't, in fact, "ala cart." Though if you sold Islamic artifacts from a streetcorner, it might be an "Allah Cart."

Sheesh, people are dumb.

2005-07-26T20:57:00.000-05:00

Perusing USA Today (McPaper under my hotel door each morning is one of the few perks of traveling for work, especially when the hot tub/pool in this hotel seem to be perpetually non-functional, and the door from the parking lot cannot be opened from outdoors with the keycard, which I suspect may be related to the sign on the lobby window, in which the local sheriff warns hotel guests of the signs

Questioning everything I thought I knew.

2005-07-26T20:55:00.000-05:00

I'm wondering, again, if I still want a baby. Not so much because of the hard work involved, though it is mind-blowingly difficult. (And something, I think, that very few people who have not had day-to-day care of a baby will know, even if they've spent lots of time with kids. I thought I knew. I was wrong. I'm sure, in fact, that even knowing what I know now, I would have no idea how physically

War, terror and the ACLU.

2005-07-25T20:42:00.000-05:00

In light of the terrorist attacks experience in our own country 4 years ago, and those affecting London and Egypt right now, I'm torn in my thinking on the matter. When I heard of the shooting on the London tube, my very first thought was, Good God, I hope this isn't some mentally ill person who simply had the misfortune to wear a heavy coat on a warm day, and to be too afraid of police to stop

A conversation with the blogger's brother, in Iraq.

2005-07-24T18:23:00.000-05:00

Sounds like the name of an 1837 poem, doesn't it? Oh, that it were.Here it is, as best as I can recall:Brother: I'm going to re-enlist. I want to finish my 20 years in the Guard so I can collect my retirement.Me: You're going to WHAT?B: Re-enlist. If I re-sign in-country, I get a $15,000 bonus, tax free. Plus all the money I make is tax free.M: Not to be an asshole, but $15,000 won't mean a lot

Another Potter theory blown to bits.

2005-07-17T13:56:00.000-05:00

Ok, as I read through the Harry Potter books, I form wild theories of what's to come, while I wait (and wait and wait) for the next volume to appear. Now that book 6 is in my hot little hands, and I've begun reading, I have to say that one long-cherished theory appears to have been way off-base. I won't mention it, in case you're not quite there yet. But I hate being wrong, I hate being in

Miss Understanding.

2005-07-16T18:01:00.000-05:00

So, the other day, we're over at Lisa's brother's house for a visit. Our six-year-old niece asks us to come hang out in her room, which--being good aunts--we do. Her birthday is just four days before my own, so when I noticed a little purse with the archer and the word "Sagittarius" stitched onto it, I picked it up and said, "Hey, we're both Sagittarius!" Lisa, sitting nearby, then correctly

The Internet...good or evil? Discuss.

2005-07-13T09:08:00.000-05:00

I'm torn about whether or not the internet is more good than bad, or vice versa. On the one hand, it brings people together from all over the world and allows them to share their experiences, their knowledge, their lives. It allows an agoraphobic woman in Tulsa to interact with the world in ways she never could have dreamed a few years ago. It allows a gay teenager in small-town America to learn

Sharp.ie

2005-07-12T21:24:00.000-05:00

Can someone you've never met, be your soulmate? Just kidding, but Jen has posted gleefully about her new baby Sharpie keychain, and all I can say is, I HAD MINE FIRST, copycat! ;-)From the Sharpie website, here's the lowdown: Sharpie® Mini Features & Benefits Go Anywhere with Sharpie!

Brain freeze.

2005-07-12T07:27:00.000-05:00

Am I the only person who has to think--I mean, REALLY think--before pressing either of the two buttons that open or close the elevator doors?There's this one, which I think closes the doors:>|What the hell? Just put the words OPEN and CLOSED on there, too, for idiots like me. Though, truth be told, I seriously doubt either of those

Needed: Armor.

2005-07-11T22:15:00.000-05:00

I am not made for life in this world, with my tender heart. I protect myself with jokes and sarcasm (which my former boss pointed out is simply the verbalization of hostility and anger; I disagreed, until my therapist said, "She's right, you know." Damn.). I saw a woman today, sitting in a wheelchair while holding a cane, waiting for someone--I wasn't immediately sure who--to pay the cashier for

We ARE a family, a-hole.

2005-07-11T08:00:00.000-05:00

That moronic senator from Pennsylvania, Rick Santorum, (the link goes to his website...send him a note, why don't ya?), has written a book. I don't know if it's new, or if I'm just slow on the uptake, but it's called It Takes a Family, and its title is a direct response to Hillary Clinton's It Takes a Village. Santorum, you ass, I am in a family. You may not LIKE my family, but I don't really

Praise the lord.

2005-07-09T21:45:00.000-05:00

When I was ready to go to college, I was a very naive person who knew NOTHING, really, about college. My parents had each gone for a little over a year, but neither had graduated at that point and were so out of touch that my mom still thought--in 1988--that I would have an enforced curfew and a "dorm mother." Imagine her surprise when she found that the adult who was responsible for me was a 19-

Ah, I didn't know you cared...

2005-07-09T11:51:00.000-05:00

Just kidding. I knew you CARED, I just didn't know anyone noticed that my blogging was sporadic at best. Anyway, yes, the being out of town was a huge boost to my free time, but a lot of the problem has also been the moving, settling in, reorganizing the household budget, bills, etc, so now that we're mostly really living in our new home instead of just moving into it, I hope to have time to fill

Hot girl-on-girl action.

2005-07-07T21:05:00.000-05:00

Wait, don't get too excited. I'm talking about Hillary Clinton. David Remnick has a very funny piece in the New Yorker about Edward Klein's book, The Truth About Hillary, and with Klein's seeming obsession with the fact that Hillary (gasp!) knows actual lesbians. He concludes, of course, that she might even BE a lesbo, masquerading as a straight married woman. Well, who cares, Ed? George Bush, to

Give me liberty...or give me death.

2005-07-07T17:38:00.000-05:00

I wonder how Patrick Henry would feel about sharing his name with a college whose mission it is to train home-schooled evangelical conservatives to be right-wing political operatives. I read about this is the New Yorker and I don't know what frightened me most: the whole idea of it, or the fact that one of the young couples featured in the story hugged when they became engaged because "they

An Army of One, my ass.

2005-07-07T07:28:00.000-05:00

I'm so sick of the recent commercials for the Army & Army Reserve, in which some young kid is trying to convince his or her parents that they really, really need to join the army to become a better person. And hey, Mom & Dad, they'll give me money for college and great training! One boy even says to his dad, "hey, it's the Reserves. They'll train me around here until they need me."Well, fella,

Life is simply. Not. Fair.

2005-07-06T20:37:00.000-05:00

A friend of mine became a grandmother today. At the age of 34.For the record, she's precisely 3 months younger than I am. And she's a grandmother because her oldest child--aged 15, or perhaps not quite 15--has fathered his own child, a child whose mother is 13 years old, neglected by her own family and is abused in one or more ways by this baby's father. (I'm not speculating here; I've heard his

My celebrity crush.

2005-07-05T22:20:00.000-05:00

I admit it. I have a celebrity crush. Just one, though. (Ok, if you don't count Pierce Brosnan, Prince William or Annette Bening. Or Sela Ward. Or Susan Sarandon. Or Mariska Hargitay. Or Hugh Grant. Or...well, you get the picture. I'm a liar and I read way too much People Magazine.)Anyway, I have a little thing for Jodie Foster. Not a John Hinckley thing, mind you...even though I don't care for

I've been tagged.

2005-06-19T21:32:00.000-05:00

Shelly tagged me, in a round-the-internet game to name one's six favorite songs, and then tag six other people to do the same. I don't think I know six other people to tag, and I know I'm a lame-o, but I'm just going to try to do my six favorite songs:1. Love Comes Quickly by Pet Shop Boys (really ANYTHING by Pet Shop Boys)2. Hold Me by Fleetwood Mac3. Regret by New Order4. The Lucky One by

Wanting a baby. Maybe.

2005-05-02T14:00:00.000-05:00

Well, I've been lax on the posting, primarly because I'm writing another blog under an assumed name. (That sounds clandestine and mysterious, doesn't it? Not really. I'm blogging on behalf of my niece, Alexis, so that her parents and sundry others can keep abreast of her daily goings-on form many thousands of miles away.) But I've been lax also because, frankly, we're not trying to get pregnant.

Parenting 101.

2005-04-17T21:19:00.000-05:00

Well, we've been pseudo-parents to our niece for the past month, and I feel compelled to mention a few of the things I've learned from parenting other people's kids.Sleep is a nonrenewable resource. And while gas is expensive, I'd pay WAY more than $2.09 a gallon for some sleep.On the flip side, you can stay up late whenever you like. I'm a bit of a night owl, but I force myself to keep more

Hoping for good news.

2005-04-07T09:35:00.000-05:00

My fingers are crossed for a friend who's waiting to hear about grad schools. I can only imagine the combination of excitement and dread with which he opens his mailbox each evening. The good thing, Jeff, is that you don't have to go to grad school to be a great writer. Medical school would be another story, altogether!

The fourth turtle of the apocalypse.

2005-03-21T09:19:00.000-06:00

Oh my god. This man is seriously odd.

Someone's falling down on the job.

2005-03-17T21:33:00.000-06:00

Ok, ok, so I'm not blogging and you're not noticing, which works out well for both of us, doesn't it? Anyway, I have a good reason. My little munchkin niece has come to live with us while her parents fight George W.'s Middle Eastern morass. (Silly me, I thought all this time he was saying it was a war on "terra." Turns out, I think, that what he's wanting to fight is a war on terrorISM. That's an

What's the matter with Kansas?

2005-02-25T20:58:00.000-06:00

Ladies and gentleman, we're now arriving in Kansas. Please bring your seatbacks and tray tables to their full upright and locked position, and reset your watches. The time in Kansas is now, like, 1854 or something.What the hell? Phill (love the second "L" there, buddy) Kline, the esteemed Attorney General of Kansas, feels he needs to review the abortion records of women so he can prosecute

Well, thank heaven for that.

2005-02-23T13:08:00.000-06:00

Burning Manure Pile in Nebraska Goes OutAn actual headline. And I think nothing more need be said, but I can't help but wonder if the burning manure might have been an improvement.Tomorrow's headline:TOURISM SUFFERS SHARP DECLINE IN NEBRASKAConvention & Visitors Bureau Plans to Set Fire to An "Even Bigger" Pile of Shit I should be grateful the world is experiencing a slow news day.

I shouldn't care.

2005-02-21T18:39:00.000-06:00

It shouldn't matter to me at all that the Boston Red Sox players seem to spend all of their waking moments insulting the Yankees' third baseman, Alex Rodriguez. I hate both teams, after all. But the fact that there is no hockey is causing me to read far more of the baseball coverage in the New York Times than I normally would. And it provides an interesting angle on how issues (or, in this case,

Saturday Night. Live?

2005-02-21T18:29:00.000-06:00

Sometimes you just want to repeat a joke you heard on SNL. I know, it doesn't happen VERY often, but when it does, this site could be indispensable.Two of my all-time favorites are Colonel Angus and Christina Aguilera's hilariously transgendered impression of Kim Cattrall. "Sweet lady New York, you are the fifth whore at this table."Indeed.

Politically correct.

2005-02-19T19:05:00.000-06:00

I don't know how I feel about the recent remarks made by Harvard president Lawrence Summers. He opines that women may be underrepresented in the sciences not only because of gender bias, but also because of innate biological differences, and also mentioned that married women are far less likely to want to work 80 hours per week than married men. It's caused quite a firestorm, but it's hard for me

2005-02-07T22:47:00.000-06:00

When in doubt, post a picture instead.

No new tale to tell.

2005-02-05T22:01:00.000-06:00

Ah, what to bore you with today? So much news, so little time. Well, there's always... The fact that I'm taking a pay cut to facilitate a transfer with my company, but don't yet know how much of a pay cut I'll be taking. Thoughts and prayers are gratefully accepted, as I will likely find out Monday what offer is on the table. After that, donations may also be gratefully accepted. The fact

The fringe benefits of being gay.

2005-01-30T09:57:00.000-06:00

You know, being gay is the first truly "alternative" thing I've ever been, or done. It's like instant street cred, scaring middle America and making them think I'm after their kids or something. I feel like Marilyn Manson, with people going "Oooh, scary, rotting our kids' minds, against God's Plan." But inside Marilyn is probably saying, "I'm just little old Brian from Cleveland." Well, I'm just

Falling on deaf ears.

2005-01-29T15:06:00.000-06:00

Congress.org is a great website, really. I had visited there quite frequently around the time of the elections in November, and hadn't been there for a while but checked in yesterday. It does a great job of helping you located and contact your elected representatives in Washington, and in addition it provides a "Soapbox" for a bit of editorializing on any side of any issue. More discussion can

I'm not spam, I'm just drawn that way.

2005-01-28T18:34:00.000-06:00

Jen has pointed me in the direction of Spamusement, in which hilarious cartoons are drawn from inspiring spam e-mail subject lines. I am still laughing.

My favorite spam.

2005-01-27T07:58:00.000-06:00

Of all the spam I've received, I think my favorite is from Christiandebtremovers.org. "Eliminate your bills the Christian way," it promises, whith a lovely graphic of a couple canoodling on a beach at sunset. (A married couple, one would hope, or there should be NO canoodling.) It features a verse from the Bible that says "The borrower...is a slave to the lender." First off, I'm dying to know

Where I'm from.

2005-01-25T23:19:00.000-06:00